As the sun sets on Day 5 of the Whole30 this is where I am at. I have left the happy diet behind and I’m still happy. So far I’m fairly unscathed which doesn’t make great fodder for a blog. But seriously in 5 days ….not one peach green tea lemonade. Not one bag of BBQ chips from Starbucks. No hot tomales. Truly folks I was eating those things at least once daily (she says with embarrassment). I survived the movie on Friday with NO popcorn. Went to a potluck yesterday and said no to fresh baked buns (right out of the oven). The heavenly aroma was all I enjoyed. Also no to the whip creamy chocolately cakey dessert. Peeps! This is huge. And I’m saving lots of money at Starbucks as I don’t go everyday and when I do, I drink unsweetened tea. It’s cheap. It should be it’s basically hot water that smells good. I have 6 free drinks at Starbucks but I’m saving them for the expensive real beverages when I am done Whole 30. However, I am hoping that I will no longer like or crave those sickeningly sweet drinks like I used to.
Im thinking maybe I wasn’t actually addicted to the things above after all, I was just making poor choices out of apathy. Because I really do NOT want to kill anyone or bite their head off (at the moment) because I am so deprived and going through withdrawal symptoms. I’m not even thinking about my favorite things (except when I write about them). I feel my discipline, self control and dignity have returned.
Here is what I do feel. I feel empowered. No one is holding a gun to my head or blackmailing me into doing this program. It’s a choice I made on my own for my own health and benefit. If I cheat or find ways around the rules I am the one who has lost. I certainly don’t win. And although I’m only 1/6 of the way there I already feel better. I know, hard to believe. The book said you would feel worse before you feel better which proves you can’t believe everything you read.
Its really amazing how good you can feel about yourself by making wise choices and carrying them through. You start to trust yourself again and believe in yourself.
Upon reflection I think I was just SO ready for this. After a year of steady weight gain and depression and apathy and general malaise I was more than ready to do something positive to improve my health and well being. I had to do something different. I had to do something! And although I may still look like the same old couch potatoe I was last week I am changing from the inside out. I’ve put myself on a morning power walking regime as well and even that is self affirming.
I don’t know what lies ahead in the 25 days to come but today, in this moment, I am grateful I made this choice because it’s already changing my life and I desperately needed a change.
Viva la Whole 30.
The Red Plaid Apron 