The Nasty New Normal

I had lots to do today, but, my daughter invited me along on some errands she had to run. I never say no to spending time with my kids, especially if they initiate. I am sure you mothers know exactly what I’m talking about.

First stop, my favorite italian market. We had to stand in line outside as they were only letting so many in. We donned our face masks and waited in line. We expected this. Lexie pulling me over as I was getting too close to the girl in front of us. I forgot. Once we were at the front of the line, the staff member gave us a bit of a judgemental look and said, you’re going in together? Us: is that ok? Him: Fine. As long as long as only one of you goes through the till. What? Plus he wasn’t letting us in until he soaked us down with substitute hand santitizer made in a brewery. It’s very wet and drippy and you end up smelling like a bottle of wine. Me: is it ok if I use my own? Him: Sure, but let me watch you apply it.

I kept getting messed up by the arrows on the floor because in spots there were none and I wondered ‘how to I get over there from here?’ I felt like I was playing a social distancing game of Twister. I’m getting pretty good at my long jump. I got my chocolate croissants and a basil plant and hightailed it out of there. Used to be one of my favorite places. I won’t be going back there anytime soon. I’ll learn how to make my own chocolate croissants.

We stopped at our favorite mall to procure an essential item Lexie needed but, of course, decided to snoop around a bit. You know, go to some of our favorite stores that we hadn’t set foot in for about two and a half months….Brewery hand sanitizer at one store (I used my own) and instructed at the door to only try on clothes in change rooms…even purses and shoes. Then we go over to another store and your not allowed to try on the clothes at all. Just make your best guess on size and you can return it in 2021 if you need to. I stopped quickly at the book store…. donning a face mask and bypassing their brewery hand sanitizer once again. The employee at the door: Wow, that sure smells a lot better than ours. Yes. Yes, it does. I had to keep telling the door guards that my hand sanitizer had 68% alchohol.

One of the mall guards approached us and said: if you are just going to chit chat could you go stand over there? That’s ok,  we were just leaving.

Next stop, the garden store.  The whole hand sanitizer thing again. These great big spray bottles. No thanks, I already showered. Mostly freewheeling there. Pleasant enough. However, I overheard a staff person telling these ladies, that were mumbling under their face masks, bedding plants are the new toilet paper. We are out! Finally, standing outside on the curb waiting for Lexie and I had to keep moving so I didn’t accidentally touch anyone trying to get by. Felt like a game of dodge ball.

Yes, the stores are opening but the fun is gone. Maybe shopping was never meant to be a fun activity.  Maybe I got it all wrong.  I’m not going back to any of these places in a long long time. I mean, I get that they are just following protocol so they can be open. I get that. If they don’t do these things then they will be shut down again. I do get that.  I actually feel bad for them.  But just because they are open, doesn’t mean I have to go there. And I mostly likely will not return for quite some time.  It’s my choice. I am quite enjoying the benefits of online shopping. I can get my essentials at the grocery store and everything else, online or go without. Which isn’t such a bad idea anyway.

I didn’t realize how good we had it prior to this. I just took my long leisurely afternoons at Chapters and Starbucks for granted. Like they’d never end. Meeting friends there to chat for hours. Going to movies every Friday night. Taking all out out-of-town visitors to Chinook as a form of entertainment. Going to our favorite patisserie’s when the day was lovely. Driving out to Banff or Lake Louise for the afternoon. I read today that an Albertan found a hate note on his car, parked momentarily, in Revelstoke, telling him to go home (most in expletives). Is this the new normal? Because if it is, I will be more than happy to stay at home forever.

My husband suggested we go out for dinner for my birthday – because – we can now. I’m thinking, let’s just have a BBQ in the back yard. I’m not afraid of catching anything (and I’m trying to do my part not to spread anything),  it’s more that I just don’t like the world anymore. And I don’t like how it’s making people act.  Paul ( of biblical fame) suggests  we make it our ambition to lead a quiet and simple life and mind our own business…. i think I’ll try that. I’ll stay home and take care of my sourdough starter.