Intentionality

I have to admit I was getting exhausted playing the victim and acting like there was nothing I had control over or nothing I could do about my circumstances. I was infected by some kind of malaise.  I knew there had to be a better way because in years gone by I have lived with intentionality but these past couple of years I kind of lost my footing and my mind, really.  I did not take every thought captive or cast down imaginations, I just let them run amuk and mess me up.  Pull me down like an under current and swirl me so far away from my purpose and my life and my mission statement.

I am filled with the hope of a better way to live.  AND I am fully aware that people and circumstances and you know who – the one who shall not be named – will try to steal that hope from me.  It’s a rather interesting phenomenon that people that haven’t had the same revelation for purpose and hope as you have had will try to undermine you because they don’t want to be left behind but they don’t want to do anything about their own circumstance either.  So I am armed with this knowledge and am on the lookout for saboteurs. This is a real thing folks.

I shall start my intentionality this very day. There is no time to waste.  I wasted enough time (years) not being intentional.  I get to choose.  I get to choose my response to everything.  Not only do I get to choose my response,  I can also initiate whatever isn’t happening that I want to have happen.  This is power.  Choice is power and intentionality is power. Its as if I’ve been given an amazing new weapon with which to plow through lifes crap.  And this weapon has binoculars on it to allow me to see the possibilities of going after what I want.  What I believe in.  Of recognizing and separating the wheat and the chaff.  Uncluttering, not just my surroundings, but my mind and my perceptions so that the only thoughts left are those of hope and possibility.  Determination.  I want to be a person that makes things happen not someone who is waiting for someone else to pick up the mantle.  Not sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring or the door waiting for it to be knocked on.  Sorry, but I will be out being intentional.

This past October, during our Thanksgiving dinner, my lovely hardwood floor got very badly scratched up.  I was in distress over it.  My home was marred.  No longer this thing of beauty and perfection.  In actual fact, there are many other things that are in need of repair around here, but not obvious things.  This imperfection on my floor was smack dab in the middle of the area people first see when they walk into our living area.  Well, we’ve been here for over eight years and even thought the house was new when we moved in, it is showing wear and tear.  Finally, I decided to just throw a rug over the area and forget about it.   How important is that in the big scheme of things?  Am I going to let that mess me up?   I need a home where people can live and make memories.  Its not a shrine or a museum.  I don’t want family and guests to have to tip toe around all my precious worldly possessions.  I want them to feel comfortable and at home and I want them to linger because the atmosphere is so full of love and camaraderie.  I want my home to be a safe place. Now it just looks more like the Banff Springs, old and worn but elegant and lived in. A place people want to be.

I shared that as an example of how I want to let go of what just doesn’t matter to make room to cling to what really does.  People are important.  Hardwood floors are not. I want to be intentional about the important things in life.  Relationships.  Health.  Work ethic.  Integrity.  Honesty.  Compassion. Family. Time that’s slipping through our fingers. My spiritual life.  These are the things that are important.

Putting on the glitz or trying to impress people with my talents and abilities is not high on the list of priorities. In fact, it shouldn’t be on the list at all.  That said,  I do feel compelled to use the talents that the Lord has given me. The creativity that I love to use.  Its my gift and I should not hide that under a bushel.  Its my light and the Lord wants me to use it.  So my motivation is not to impress but rather to steward my talents and use them to the glory of God and others.  I want to lose the false modesty and realize that I am a creative.  Not everyone is.  But I am.  So I need to be intentional about honing and using that gift in whatever way the Lord leads me.  It is what it is.

There will be more fodder in the ensuing days regarding intentionality but I now must depart and get started on my intentional life.