It’s waking up to sunshine, to a loving spouse, to rain, to chimes, to purpose, to faith. It’s just waking up at all. It’s energy to get out of bed and do all the things that are required of you from that first moment and for the rest of the day. It’s health. When nothing hurts or feels bad. It’s people to love. It’s people who love me. It’s walking and moving and breathing in fresh air and clearing out the cobwebs to think straight and make decisions. It’s birds chirping and singing as if they didn’t have a care in the world. It’s safety in our city and our country. It’s not hearing bombs drop and not seeing military with rifles on every corner. It’s fresh air to breath and fill our lungs. It’s majestic mountains to climb and hike, to photograph, to drive through, to remind us of His majesty.

It’s Mike, my husband of 36 years. My partner in life and love. It’s Andrew, my son who has brought us joy since the first day he was born. It’s Lexie, my daughter who has been a blessing since her first breath and cry. It’s knowing that these kids are my greatest accomplishment in life. If I ever wonder if I’ve done anything right -it’s them.

It’s food, glorious food. Not just for nourishment but for pleasure and community and as a way to serve others. It’s baking. It’s the process of taking ingredients that don’t taste good on their own and combining them to make something Heavenly. It’s cooking. It’s time lovingly spent to provide sustenance and nourishment to myself and others.

It’s friends. It’s having that commraderie. People who need people are the luckiest people in the world. It’s having a home group. It’s knowing you have a home team, knowing you have someone in your court, people that want to spend time with you, people you can call in crisis, people you can call in the middle of the night. It’s community. It’s belonging somewhere. It’s being part of something bigger than yourself. It’s having a pastor or spiritual leader with Godly wisdom to warn us, admonish us, encourage us and remind us of Gods love. It’s everyone sleeping under one roof. It’s not common to have adult children sleeping under the same roof as we do but its our reality at the moment and I love it. I love knowing I can actually be here for them when they don’t have any significant others in their lives yet. We are it. It’s family. Again that feeling of belonging and that love that only a family has for you. It’s siblings, and in laws. its grandparents and parents. it’s nieces and nephews and cousins.

It’s problems. If I didn’t have a problem how would I know my God could solve them. It’s pain. We have to know pain and sickness to know and understand healing. It’s loss. We have to know grief in order to know the Fathers comfort. The greater the love the greater the grief. Intense grief reminds how blessed we were to experience such deep love. It’s tribulation. It’s being humbled and strengthened at the same time. This builds character and integrity like nothing else does. It’s helping others. It’s taking our eyes off ourselves temporarily and meeting the needs of another. The act of helping others is validating and empowering and brings deep fulfillment when all is said and done. It’s empathy. It’s your understanding of others and their understanding of you. It’s encouragement. Who doesn’t love to be encouraged? Who doesn’t need to be encouraged? It’s support. Its knowing you are never on your own. It’s knowing you have your own fan club. Nothing like it. Dont under estimate.

It’s exercise. Our bodies were made to move. It’s how they function best. Exercise can be medicine. It’s hard work. It’s knowing we are valuable and contributing to society. It’s meaning and purpose and fulfillment not to mention provision. We are to work as unto the Lord. It’s commitment. it’s loyalty. It’s integrity. It’s letting your yes mean yes and your no mean no. It’s authenticity. It’s about people actually knowing you and how your most likely to respond. It’s being a safe place for others and being trustworthy. It’s showing consistency of character. It’s being real. It’s discipline. It’s keeping your promises to yourself so you can trust yourself. It’s crying. Tears are a wonderful way to let out pent up emotions -good or bad. It’s a cleansing of the soul. It’s laughing. It is said that laughter is the best medicine. Try it. Let your self laugh and don’t take much of this life too seriously. It’s about celebrating life any chance we get. Any excuse. Life is a celebration.

It’s the ocean waves crashing against the shore on a warm Kona night as you lay awake in bed and realize you are on a tiny island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. It’s rain falling down cleansing the earth and refreshing all. The sound of rain falling on your tent. It’s soothing and hypnotic.It’s snow gentling falling in front of a street lamp whitening the ground and then sparkling like Swarovski crystals. It’s music that sings the heart and soul to sleep. It’s music that makes any day a party. It’s singing. It’s wanting to sing. It’s having that lightness of heart to want to sing along. It’s Christmas with all the wonder the season brings. It’s a time of giving and sharing and peace on earth goodwill towards men. It’s gifts. It’s the spirit of giving and the joy of generosity. It’s more blessed to give than to receive. It’s surprises. I love a well planned surprise. A good surprise can change a difficult season for someone. It’s memories. Memories made and memories remembered. Reliving a special moment can comfort and sustain the heart.

It’s work. God gives us the ability to produce wealth. Work gives us purpose and fulfillment. Hard work can be so satisfying. A job well done has meaning. It’s wealth. Wealth is not just monetary. It’s wealth of health and wealth of soul and wealth of relationships. It’s talents. It’s recognizing and using the unique talents God has given us. These talents are a gift with which we can create our lives and experiences and bless others.

It’s movies. It’s an escape from reality when needed. Anything can happen in movies with all their special effects and script writing. Things we only dream about. It’s reading. It’s the ability to read. It’s the chance to live out some other story with new characters for a period of time. To get lost in their story and gain insight for your own. It’s a way to go on a vacation without ever leaving home. It’s books. Even in this world of fast paced, state-of-the-art technology there is still something about opening a book and turning its pages that is so gratifying. It’s a library of possibilities and knowledge and history and fairytales. It’s writing. It’s having a story to tell and putting pen to paper. It’s journaling to remember and to let go. It’s journaling for clarity and problem solving. It’s writing to let others know they are not alone on their thoughts, feelings and experiences. It’s pictures. A picture’s worth a 1000 words. So true. A picture speaks every language. Everyone understands a picture. It’s proof of our life and experience. It’s painting. It’s dragging a brush of paint across a canvas. It’s cathartic even if you’re not an artist. And whose to say you are not an artist. If it heals and brings joy, do it! It’s drifting along smooth waters in a paddle boat or blasting across the waves in a motor boat with the sea spray refreshing your being. It’s catching the wind in your sails and cruising along in a sailboat watching the shoreline race by or catching the sunset on the water. There is something about being on the water with all its tranquility and power.

It’s a million little things leading to peace, love and joy. It’s a million little things to be grateful for. It’s a million things to treasure. It’s a million little things that make up a life well lived. It’s a million little things.

 

 

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Sent from Gmail Mobile

I consider myself, of all women (and children) most blessed. I had a father  who was a stellar man. A man of integrity and quiet inner strength. A man of humour and love of family.  I was named after him so thats probably why I was his favorite – I mean, he was MY favorite. His name was Gerald, thus the Geraldine. Apparently you name the second son after the father but I turned out to be a girl. His middle name was Ross and so my middle name is Rae.

I thought my dad was great! I loved the way he used to lay on the living room rug in front of the stereo every Sunday afternoon and listen to his favorite music. Now that music is my favorite music too. I’m listening to it now.

Of course he used to roll on the floor laughing when we put on performances at home which we did quite often. Yes, we had our own little Broadway thing going on, with costumes and sets and even music that yours truly made up. We used to sell tickets and popcorn and dad never wanted to pay because he claimed the paper the tickets were printed on and the popcorn were his in the first place. He had a point.

I loved going camping with my dad. He turned it into such a cool adventure. He had our tent trailer decked out with the most imaginative conveniences. He made us color coded drawers in the trailer so we wouldn’t need suitcases. And he rigged up the best kitchen tent. He even cooked a roast on the exhaust manifold as we drove through the mountains listening to Hagood Hardy on the 8track. The aroma was getting pretty intense as we drove into the campground. I’m sure everyone else thought the Gallopping Gourmets food truck had arrived. Imagine…. having a roast beef dinner while you’re camping. Dad knew how to camp in style.

When mom was in the hospital having my younger siblings and dad had to take care of the rest of us he was always resourceful. We girls always had long hair and in order to get our hair in ponytails, the easiest hairdo he could think of, dad placed an elastic around the hose of the vacuum cleaner and sucked our hair into it then slid the elastic into our hair. Not sure how clean our hair was after but it did the trick.

With 7 kids to feed one had to be economical and creative so dad invented one of our favorite meals ‘beans, bologna and cheese’ and nobody could spread a pizza crust, with no holes, as thin as my dad. He invented thin crust pizza.

I remember dad quitting a job because he was asked to do something unethical. At that time he probably had 5 kids and a wife to take care of but he wasn’t going to make a living being someone’s yes man and undermining his own integrity. I was so proud of him even though I knew this meant tough times. We were living in Regina at the time, I think,  and he was offered a job in northern Manitoba and was vasilating as to whether to uproot his family and move and was actually discussing it with the whole family and I think it was me that said “what have we got too lose?” And Dad agreed and we moved back to Manitoba.

When I evolved into a teenager it didn’t take me long to figure out that if I wanted something I ask dad first, even though mom was the real boss. I knew dad would say yes and then what’s mom gonna do? In Grade 8 I wanted to go to the school dance with Dennis Watier, the jewellers son. So I asked dad. Of course he said yes and I skipped the lecture I would have received from mom. She caved and made me a dress to wear on my first date. The most hedious coral coloured fortel dress. I wonder if she made it hideous on purpose. I mean, let’s get serious, nothing looked good in fortrel. I only think it was popular because it wore like a suit of armour.

Actually one of my favorite memories was of Dad playing tennis with us. He always used just one hand to win (every single time) because he had to hold his cigarette in the other one. He reminded me of James Bond.

When I was in high school dad bought a motor boat since we lived 30 minutes away from Clearwater Lake in Manitoba. We felt like we were the most spoiled kids ever. I loved that boat. Dad and my older brother, Mick, went fishing one time and dad dropped his watch into the water and jumped in after it. Which was odd because dad couldn’t swim making it necessary for Mick to jump in after him and save him. Mick had his bronze medallion in swimming which gave him lifeguard status. I believe the watch still sits at the bottom of Clearwater lake like artifacts from the Titanic.

Dad was a man of few words but when he did talk you had better listen up because it was going to be something profound and wise. Like: if you’re going to be a smartass then first you’d better make sure you’re smart otherwise you’re just an ass. And: don’t sweat the small stuff (which he was telling us long before the book of the same name came out). Dad and I seemed to be able to connect just by sitting in the same room, same couch, no words spoken.

When many of us, one by one, decided to go to Bible college Dad was totally ok with it even though he wasn’t a believer. He even helped us get there and came to hear our singing groups or our preaching when we made trips with the college to small towns in Saskatchewan and Manitoba. I felt he was very proud of his kids and how they were turning out. Mom has told me that dad was never happier than when all his kids were home and as a parent now, I know exactly how he felt.

Dad saved my life in a major relationship crisis after I graduated from Bible college. I was living in Saskatoon and found myself engaged to a young man I knew I would never marry but I didn’t know how to end it. I won’t go into the details but Dad heroically saved me from making a huge mistake when I was totally incapable of getting myself out of this mess and he did it with such love and strength. I will forever be grateful for what he did for me as it literally changed the course of my life.

The way dad took care of me during this difficult time for me reminded me of my Heavenly Father. Dad poured out wisdom and encouragement and love and told me he had a plan for my immediate future and he also told me not to be afraid because he would be right outside waiting for me as I carried out the dastardly deed. True to his word he was waiting for me and consoled me and put me on a plane for Calgary to live with my uncle (his brother – my second favorite man on the planet at that time).

Mom and dad moved to Calgary in 1996 and moved into an apartment two blocks away from us. Dad was always willing to help out with whatever we needed such as bringing me spare keys while I was going through a sleep deprived phase and constantly locking my keys in my car.Dad helped me transform my basement into a sewing studio so I could teach sewing classes to kids to finance my own kids going to a private school. He also helped me recover many pieces of furniture. We were a good team. Again, very few words were spoken but we were on the same wave length. I remember running into a conundrum with the fabric as we were recovering a couch and he thought of a solution but it involved compromising perfection. I’m not a perfectionist either  and I was thinking of the exact same solution and we just looked at each other and both knew what the other was thinking. That’s how we were going to solve the problem and we did.

After dads first heart attack, that miraculously didn’t kill him, he tried to escape the hospital. After his Code Blue, he found his cowboy boots in a closet and put them on and the nurses found him in the hall on the phone calling a taxi. He was hilarious if not delusional. We had him for for 12 more precious years after that.

I don’t remember the exact circumstances but I will never forget my dad telling me that ‘I was a good daughter’. That affirmation has carried me through many difficult circumstances and influenced many of my choices since his passing. I wear his name with pride and love and pray I will do it justice.

Thanks dad for your legacy and I remember you on this and every Fathers Day. You were my father, my fan and my friend.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Lord is my Shepherd. He is taking care of me as a shepherd takes care of His sheep. They need taking care of as they are rather dumb animals I’ve heard. Without a shepherd, they would be falling off cliffs, starving and eaten by larger animals. As it turns out we are the sheep. I am a sheep. I am one that would wander off and plunge myself to the bottom of the canyon were my shepherd not paying attention to my every move. Now if a sheep is determined to jump out of the shepherds arms or wander from his sight and care and plunge himself into tragedy and despair the shepherd will not always grab him by the hook of his staff and drag him back. Well if we are talking about literal sheep and a literal shepherd, then he probably would so I guess this is where the metaphor ends because people are a lot more intelligent than sheep and we have a free will and soul and the shepherd will not infringe on that freewill since it is a gift. Run on sentences are not a sin.

I shall not want -I’ll have everything I need. It doesn’t mean I’ll have every worldly self indulgent thing I think I want and think I need. But I will not be lacking anything to live this life and to thrive and to find purpose. If it’s a necessity of life I shall have it.

He makes me to lie down in green pastures. He will give me rest in blessed places. And if I don’t choose rest he will ‘make’ me lie down. The other mans grass is not always greener. Nobody’s grass is greener than the Lords. And this is where I will lay down.

He leads me beside still waters. He is leading me. By still waters and in green pastures. I have felt this peace at certain times in my life, when I’m not fighting against it.

He restoreth my soul. Only He can restore my soul. I go out and damage and destroy my soul with bad choices and sin and He puts me back together….every single time.

He leads me in paths of righteousness for his names sake. There’s that word again. He is still leading me. This time in paths of righteousness. He will always lead me to what is right and pure and true. He will show me the way. I just need to follow.

Even when I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil. As I walk through the ‘shadow’ of death. Just the shadow (which can be scary and dark) but it’s only a shadow, He is there with me. Walking right beside me. I have nothing to fear. The creator of the universe is by my side.

Thy rod and thy staff comfort me. I’ve always considered the rod to be the royal sceptre of his majesty and the staff to be his tool as a shepherd… either way He is comforting me, as King and as Shepherd.

He prepares a table for me in the presence of my enemies. I love this. He is going to prepare a meal for me and I can sit in perfect safety and eat slowly and abundantly even though surrounded by enemies that want to devour me. It’s as if there is an invisible wall protecting me. I can only imagine this makes the enemy furious that he can’t touch me.

He annoints my head with oil. Oil is usually used to make things run smoother and work better so I interpret this as God making things work out for my good and giving me seasons of ease.

My cup runneth over. And as God pours out his blessing and oil on me He is not stingy. That blessed oil is running all over the place so I have lots of blessing to share. I always have more than enough.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. Not only does He lead me and walk beside me. But He’s also got my back. He’s following me with His constant goodness and mercy. It doesn’t get any better than that. And He’s following me all the days of my life. That’s right here, right now, while I am living on this earth. I don’t have to wait for eternity. I can experience his goodness and mercy while I walk this earth. I’m totally surrounded by the Shepherd, the King, the creator.

And I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever. This is the ultimate bonus.  After He leads me and walks with me and follows me every minute of every hour of my life here on earth, I get to spend eternity with Him. I will live in His house. Right now He is living in my house and I will spend eternity living in His.

Surely you know I am no theologian and certainly this is no commentary but this is how this verse reads to me. It has always brought me great comfort and encouragement. This is his promise for all who will follow Him.

Shalom!

 

 

 

 

Have you ever been tempted to turn something impromptu and simple into a big splashy affair? Probably not. Because your not insane like I am. I am tempted to do this ALL the time. Why? I have to ask myself. I invite some people over to celebrate a special event. I do this 5 days before said event. Then I start thinking we need an activity so as I formulate a plan for an activity I start to feel we need props and atmosphere. The next thing you know I am pinteresting for ideas and special effects. There are so many great food ideas that I begin to imagine we need to taste them all. I start making lists and plans and wonder how I’m going to get it all done. I enlist the help of my creatively talented sidekick, my daughter. She just kind of goes along with it because she is used to my pathological need to create events as if I’m Colin Cowie. (Google him).

All the guests have asked what they could bring to the table, so to speak. I tell them I’ll get back to them as soon as my master plan is formulated. While I’m laying in bed counting sheep and lamb and beef and chicken and salmon I hear this not so wee small voice yelling in the silence. STOP. STOP RIGHT NOW. What?? I’m just doing my thing. NOT THIS TIME SISTER.

What was my purpose in inviting this particular group of friends over in the first place? Well…. to honor the men in our lives. To acknowledge their contribution to our families. To ensure that no one was left alone with difficult circumstances on this day and to create community and combat loneliness. As it so happens, I really love this group of people and I wanted to spend time together because we always have so much fun. It’s also no small thing that all of the children of these particular friends are friends with our adult kids as well. In fact that is how we happened to become friends. We were drawn together by our kids friendships.

Anyway, we all need to eat every day so naturally food will be involved. So why not keep it simple and just achieve the main goal which is to bond over the breaking of bread. Of course I won’t be breaking any bread because I’m off gluten and grains for a spell. No matter. So I tell my daughter to nevermind about the preparations, go out with her friends this weekend and I text each family to bring their own meat and a side and we are good to go. No pressure. No stress. No pretenses. Just good friends, good food and good times.

Looking forward to it.

 

As I have been waiting on the Lord these last couple of months, I have heard His voice in my spirit in regards to several bad habits. I was hoping He would speak to me about my purpose in life or show me the amazing new opportunity He has prepared for me but no, He keeps bringing me back to things I need to change and work on. Is this my new job? Changing myself? Not really what I had in mind.

One of those habits being my occasional harsh tone. Ok maybe more than occasionally. Alright… all the time. Get off my back.

And I responded ‘Lord I don’t want to have a harsh tone because harshness is not what’s in my heart’. The Lord and I had touched on this subject in the past and I would try to change my tone and my high voltage responses by the force of sheer will power. I could do it for awhile as long as I was fully aware and focused and nothing scary was happening. But then something my heart perceived as a crisis hit and I reverted back to harsh responses.

I finally realize that the only way to change my responses and tone is to change my heart. Everything that comes out of our mouths is rooted in the heart. Guard your heart for out of it flows the well spring of life. So I searched my heart and was surprised at what I found there. Instead of anger, hate and a mean spirit what I found was fear, loss of control and helplessness (or despair). Most of my reactive responses were rooted in fear. Fear of pain. Fear of loss. Fear of having no control of a situation. Fear of disrespect. Fear of not being able to help or change anything. Just pure anadulterated fear. Yet, that’s not what others sense when I am harsh. They most likely perceive anger and bitterness and wanting to have all the things my way.

My fear antenae start to tingle when I hear things like: I’m going camping in the wilderness even though I’ve never camped before, I’m not going to wear all my protective gear on the motorcycle today, I’m going to London alone even though I have no money and I’m sick, I’ll just sleep in my car if I get evicted, I gave a drunk man a ride home (and I’m a vulnerable young girl) I think I’ll go back country skiing even though there’s an avalanche warning, , I’m just going to drive my old jalopy all the way to Vancouver on my own with no AMA or emergency money, I think I’ll just rewire the house even though I’m not an electrician, I think I’ll just invest in this stock with no proven track record, I think I’ll just go sneak up on the skunk living in our backyard…. I hear these things and my heart of fear and my mouth of urgency jump into action. Blew it again!

Be still and know that I am God. The only reason He allows certain things is because He knows He is never leaving us or forsaking us. He is right here inside us and in control. If He allows it, he will walk us through it… if we let him. No need to be reactive or fearful or out of control. Be calm and trust God.

Our success peace and joy in life does not hinge on what happens to us but, rather, how we respond to it. In my heart of hearts I long to have the correct response that reflects love, faith and peace. God is not finished with me yet.

In my daydreams, I am spending the rest of the my time on this earth making beautiful things and making things beautiful for others. I’m not sure what form this could take in the future or how I would pull it off but this I know for sure, God has given me a gift and I want to use it daily and I must not forget that I can do all things through Christ who gives me the strength and the creativity, not to mention the desire. I don’t want to waste my talents.

We are living in dark, evil and frightening times and in the midst of the ugliness, the pain and the madness I want to bring joy and blessing and remind people that there is still beauty to be found here on earth you just have to look for it …. or create it.

I’ve made some creative and resourceful inroads in my own life and world. But I’ve reached a saturation point. I’ve filled every nook and cranny of my own home with beautiful things and even though I am ever changing it up (redecorating with what I have) my home is the way I want it. I’ve had friends comment that my home reminds them of Chintzys and Pottery Barn. Mission accomplished and flattery received. I’ve filled my home with urns full of glorious silk flowers that look real minus the scent. I incorporate candles for that. Music always finishes off the ambience. In the winter there are the fur blankets and the fireplace, the baking and the hot chocolate, the music and books.

I’ve baked all the delicious things until we are needing to cut back. Im in the middle of reading a summer novel about a girl who cooks for others in their homes. A different client or family every night of the week. This idea really intrigues me. I’m all about the food and entertaining and gathering around the table as a means of bonding and memory making not to mention, nourishment for body and soul.

Anyone who knows me knows I love to plan parties and events. The part I love the most is creating the atmosphere. Transporting guests to another world is always my goal. That and making them feel special and blessed. Comfortable and at home. There’s not much I’d rather be doing than creating a special, blissful atmosphere to bless and to honor someone’s accomplishment or just make them feel they deserve to enjoy some magic. We all need a little magic now and then.

I am in my element creating treasures out of nothing or junk. I’ve even been known to use good supplies on occasion. I’ve always been a bargain hunter and have learned that necessity really is the mother of invention. Anybody with the means can go out and buy anything they need or want but the sign of true creativity is to be able to make something out of nothing. Beauty from ashes. Where have I heard that before?

Creativity comes from the creator! The master creator. He knows what he is doing. He makes beautiful things and I want to too!